Christianity, Grace

Divine Exchange…It is Time to Heal

When you blog here it says….”Share your story here” and as you begin to type, those letters are replaced by your story.

It is time to share a bit of my story over the last six or so months. I do this so that you understand why I was asking God the questions I was asking. Asking things like, how did the disciples continue on when so terribly persecuted. How? I mean really, how? I have heard many things taught over the years, God doesn’t give you more than you can handle, you will have what you need if this happens, etc. This is true yet, that wasn’t enough for me in this season of my life. I needed something more, a deeper understanding. 

The reason I needed this answer is because over the last half year I have seen and heard some pretty horrible stuff. This stuff comes at the hands of Christians. Shunning, character assassination, lies, division, and purposeful destruction-even to the point of trying to negatively impact jobs/businesses. Otherwise known as spiritual abuse. 

I had never heard of spiritual abuse, it is one of those nasty little secrets that those that are perpetrating it want to sweep under the rug and pretend it is not happening. Yet it is important for this to come out into the light and be talked about otherwise healing will not happen. Just like in any family where any type of abuse is occurring the problem must come into the light to be dealt with. We, as a society, do not tell people to stay in an unhealthy family situation where abuse is happening. So why in the world would we encourage people to stay in an unhealthy church situation? We need to encourage them to get free from any and all abusive situations. It is time for the church to look at what is happening within the four walls. Not every church has this problem but I am sad to say I have heard of so many people that have had a similar experience to mine. And it breaks my heart. 

All of these things I listed above happened to myself and my family-shunning, character assassination, lies, division, and purposeful destruction to the point that people that still attend this church are afraid to see us in public places and actually run away to avoid us. It is laughable now when it happens but it has been also very painful. All of this happened because I……….I really am not sure why. To this day I have not been told by any of those that are in leadership why exactly my family has been treated this way. I could make guesses, but relationship is not about guessing it is about communicating. Not only did this happen to my family, but other families who were only trying to do the right thing and love my family as Jesus would. They choose not to shun, to talk to us about what was happening, to get both sides of the story. All of a sudden whole families became blacklisted from the church just because they choose to ask questions and not shun my family. What this created in others, left in the church, as they saw some of this play out is a fear to reach out to people, which is nothing like what Jesus would do. It also has allowed the abusive cycle to continue. Absolutely crazy! Sadly though, it happens more often than we hear about. There are many others with a similar story at the hands of these same Christians. It is like a bad story that keeps repeating itself. I was a part of this abusive cycle, but now my family and I are thankful for God rescuing us. 

So, I thought my question to God was a valid one. I and many others have been hurt, persecuted by the very people who you think should “know better” and yet don’t. It is so sad. Am I mad, sure. Am I hurt, sure. Has this been easy, definitely not. Yet, God has and always will be faithful. I have been told: people will fail you but God never will. This is true. I understand that Jesus said we will be persecuted because of Him. I understand that. I think we never think it will come from inside the four walls of church. Yet, sadly it does. 

    This weekend as I was asking again, “How Lord, how did the early believers suffer such horrible things and continue on? I mean they suffered really horrible things.” He said, “it is the “Divine Exchange”. I said, “I understand that You were my Divine Exchange on the Cross.” He said, “Yes, I was and I still am.  The disciples learned to exchange their mourning for My Joy, their pain for My healing, their loss for My gain and on and on. The Divine Exchange.” That is why Paul wrote 2 Corinthians 4.  It is especially good in the Message version. Here is a bit:

Every detail works to your advantage and to God’s glory……So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever. (‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭4‬:‭15&16-18‬ MSG)

So for me, at this moment, I now understand that by His Grace I have been walking in this Divine Exchange daily, sometimes moment by moment. As I hear of things said or done regarding me; my family; and/or my friends, I have needed God’s Divine Exchange. Is this easy, no way. Is God always there, yes way! So, I am looking at Him and He is Divinely Exchanging for me. I am not doing it. He is, as I turn my face to His. 

10 thoughts on “Divine Exchange…It is Time to Heal”

  1. It is interesting to me, as I’ve read your blogs, that you actually seem to be angry at someone or something, though not naming anyone. You mention all the “abuse” your family and your friends have suffered. But after going back and re-reading some of these blogs a second time, I do not see ANY forgiveness what so ever on your part.
    You are a Christian from what I’ve gathered, but I do not see the Father’s Heart toward any who may or may not have caused you hurt or pain. I do not see you attempting to restore, heal, forgive and move on with your own life.
    Darlene, the post left by Eleazar, is such a great example of God’s love. He did not write those words in haste or with vengeance. He was attempting help you move forward – but in order to do so, there must be repentance and forgiveness. How else can you heal from your hurt. Yet your very next blog tries to rip apart his words of healing and kindness. And yet, you call yourself a Christian.
    I don’t know any of the circumstances surrounding your “alleged” abuse, but I can tell you that I sure would not want such an unforgiving person in my own life. Why is it so hard for you and your friends, who you claim have been hurt as well, why is it so hard for you all to forgive and move on and enjoy your “new” journey? It appears you want the root of hatred to reign supreme – you’re doing a good job. All Jesus wants is for any brokenness to be restored, any hurt or pain to be healed and relationship to be restored. No, I sure do not see the Father’s Heart – not in anything posted.
    As Eleazar said, “You are dearly beloved Darlene” Yes, and it truly is time to heal and forget what is behind and begin your new life.

    With the love of Jesus,



  2. Darlene, I had a dream of you. You sat on a stool in Lighthouse coffee with a gash in your arm. I walked up to you and told you to heal yourself, but you shook your head. A spotlight came upon you, and a crowd drew near to see your gash. You held your arm for them to see and they felt sorry for you. But then they began to tell you to be healed, but you did not. One by one they began to leave, until you sat alone in the spotlight with your wound.

    Here is what the dream means.
    When this began, you had many meetings with the leaders you accuse. And through the process you obtained a wound in your soul. But when the time came to he healed, you instead told it to many of how you were abused spiritually. You used it as a means to make the leadership of that church appear as legalistic and corrupt. And now that you have sustained this, many have left you because you will not heal. The Spirit told me when I awoke, “Proverbs 17:9”.

    You have revealed many truths, and been powerful in love. Darlene, you have helped many. But you have this: you have not had His heart towards your offenders. Even David, when being unjustly persecuted by Saul, said “I will not touch the Lords anointed.” And Saul was a corrupt and demonically tormented king, yet David was honored by God. How much more should you seek the good of pastors filled with the Spirit whom you have known for years? You have grown to know Him as He knows you, but can you honor those you were “delivered” from? Can you have your Fathers heart towards those pastors and the members of that church?

    You are dearly beloved Darlene, it is time to heal and forget what is behind. It is time to cease accusing and begin repairing. From one prophet to another, we both know love will heal every transgression and renew your love for each other.

    The peace and grace of Jesus be with you.


    1. I see that you have deleted yourself from WordPress. I do not “receive words” from people who think it is necessary to stay in the dark and not reveal who they are. What exactly are you afraid of? Now, if you want to reveal who you are and have an adult conversation we can do that. You know where to get in touch with me.


      1. You are correct, I deleted my account a long time ago. But it’s time for me to come out of the dark. Nathan his his face from David, along with other prophets speaking to those they knew. It’s not an unbiblical practice. But like them I sought an unfiltered interaction. And like them, I reveal who I am out of love for you, not fear. You are dear to me Darlene, and you have helped shape who I am. Including the prophetic. I love you Darlene, and I would love to grab coffee with you and Bryan to talk more sometime.



  3. Darlene,
    Thank you for putting into beautiful words a not so beautiful experience. More importantly, sharing about the Divine Exchange….. such healing words for wounded hearts to comprehend. You are awesome, and I am proud to call you ‘friend’ !!


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